A Darkness Lurking Within My Home

[Boner]

So i was cleaning out my closet today and came across a phone number on the back of a receipt. Searching deep within the realm of my mind i was unable to discover its origin. I placed the receipt on my table, and went to bed, as it was late and any attempt to call the number at this ungodly hour would have been quit discurtious. As i slept i dreamed that I pulled up a chair to my table and stared at the number for a good 45 minutes. Still unable to recall to whom this number belonged, i decided to dial the number on my cell phone. The phone rang 7 times before i finally gave in and ended the call. The second i hung up, every last drop of power in my house ceased to exist. Sitting in the darkness, i pondered the possible reason for this sudden power outage. I arose from my seat and moved over to the window. Peering out i could see the power in the homes surrounding was still quite operational. I returned to my seat once again to dwell on the situation at hand, this time scratching my head to convey my confusion. Apparently the power outage in my home extended to my brain, for the light bulb which often flares into existance whilst i ponder remained unlit. Then, a knock at the door. I arose yet again from my seat to answer said knock. As i opened the door, a rancid odor permeated throughout the vestibule.The figure that stould before me would strike fear into the heart of any man. A man, seemingly ungroomed for his entire life, wearing a tattered black suit. His eyes offered nothing but desolation, and a glow of unrighteousness clinged to his beastlike frame. He slowly raised a decrepit finger in the direction of the cell phone in my hand. I quickly inquired if it was he that the mysterious number belonged to. Without saying a word he entered my home uninvited. As he brushed past me an overwhelming feeling of cold seized my very soul. The door slammed behind him. Shaken, i made my way up the stairs in pursuit. Undesirable as his presence was, i found any attempt to ask him to leave futile, for i could form no words. He sat in the chair i had placed by the table for myself, and stared intently at the receipt his number was on. Black smoke began to rise from the paper followed by a burst of flames that consumed it, leaving no sign of ash or burn on the table.The man reached for a piece of paper and a pen and scribbled furiously. He then folded the paper and arose from his seat. I found myself no longer able to look at him, try as i may i was unable to even move my head. He slowly roamed towards the door, it opening on its own and slamming behind him. I stould unable to move for several minutes, then i felt a rush of heat and was able to move again. I scrambled over to the paper left behind to find a new number scribbled out. Without taking even a second to think it over i used my phone to call it. This time i allowed the phone to ring 77 times before i gave in and hung up. As quickly as the last call seized the power, did this breath life back into my home. I then woke up and rushed to my table to find the number gone. I glanced over to my clock to see a blinking 12:00.

[Lefiel]

and thus is the dilemma many happen to face. we find ourselfs in the course of our lives we meet various other people and exchange telephone numbers and many many other things with sad persons. we at times loose touch with these people and we either destroy the numbers, misplace them, or just completely ignore them completely. what might the cause be for the previous statement you may ask? well in case of numbers exchanged with members of the opposite sex it could be you might have lost all feelings of lust you may have had when you first encountered the member of the fairer sex, or some other person has caught your eye. in beorns case this is not applicable(it may seem so at this point), because when he called the number(albeit in his dream or maybe his subconcious willed him to actually dial the number on his cellular phone and he just dreamt he did it when he really did.), no one answered but eventually after a complete power failure in his residence, he found himself face to face with a man. this man who appears to be a very dark and misterious individual seems to have knowledge of beorns dialing of the number in question. granted it could be 100% coincidence that he appeared just as power failed and just after beorn called and hung up the phone which was used to call this mystery number. but as a great philosopher once said "Like effects entail like causes" or as another put it more plainly and directly (mind you this is most likely a simplified version of the true statement), "All of our actions happen for a reason" and thus explains away the claim that the tattered person just happend to come across beorns home just because he happend to be in the neighborhood ? highly unlikely. now with such knowledge we must now as the question, why did this man happen to visit beorn ? well after the person entered the house of beorn quite unannounced and without even asking permission he appeared to (although not proven however) to make the reciept erupt into flames and then disappear without leaving a single ash or leaving burn marks on the table, and promptly(although in a highly suspicious way in which i alas am unable to provide answer for) leave his house as suddenly as he arrived in it. as soon as he was able to recover himself he made the desicion to dial this new number the odd person left on his desk. no sooner had he hung up his phone had his power suddenly returned. afterwards he spoke of how he woke up then noticed the number gone and a clock blinking 12:00. i speculate the mysterious fellow was a dilligent member of the New York Electrical Company who was in the area who noticed beorns power become no more. he most likely took it upon himself to go to his house and leave him a number which he could use to restore his power. how his power failed in the first place, again one can only speculate.

[Golds]

So... besides summarizing all of beorn's story in verbatim, you're saying Beorn likes the cock?

[Boner]

The statement "Beorn likes the cock" is clearly implied throughout not only the post at hand, but all previous posts. To speculate Lefiel's interpretation of the post at hand insinuates Beorn liking cock is not only a discredit to Lefiel's clear understanding of all things philosophical, but also a discredit to humanity as a whole. Please look more deeply into the dissertation at hand, before making any assumptions. For as we all know, when you assume you make something that involves an ass, you, and me, which, by your interpretation, would be quite pleasurable indeed.

[Golds]

For as we all know, when you assume you make something that involves an ass, you, and me, which, by your interpretation, would be quite pleasurable indeed.

Woot! We're going to have a Donkey Rodeo!

[Lefiel]

tsk tsk my dear golds i nvr brought up sexual orientation in this post at any point. all i was doing was complete speculation. it could have been that beos power failing was a fail safe that a lady had instituted when he called her number if he called after a certain period of time(in this case he had completely forgotted to whom the number belonged) or it could be that the women he had previous relations with was fucking with his electricity at JUST the very moment he hung up. either way the man in tattered clothing was just that. he did nothing of the sexual orientation in question whilst in his home. he just spontaneously combusted a small scrap of paper and promptly exited the New York dwelling. it could very well be that this person was the boyfriend of the lady to whomever this number belonged to and his entering of beos house(showing his power to do as he pleased once over his threshold),setting the reciept on which the number was ablaze(a testiment to his growing power & control over all things including doors),having beo apparently frozen in place fail, and leaving him a new number to call. in any case the statement that "I" have stated wether directly or not that my good friend has love interests in his fellow man is perposterious.

[Civet]

You guys type WAY too much...can I have the Dr. Seuss version pls

[Lefiel]

basically my dear Civet what had happend was; beo found a number which he dreamed he called. after he hung up his power went out. sum creepy guy came by and set the reciept the number was on ablaze. eventually his power came back and when he woke up his clock was flashing 12:00. i made a lengthy, philosophically oriented reply. golds said i said beo was a queer. i made yet another lenghty sophisticated reply saying "i didnt say beo was a queer". enjoy.
also: the word "fail" nvr should have been in the prior post i made.

[Boner]

I suck at Dr Seus
So instead here's Mother Goose

There once was a dude named Boner
Who came across a mysterious number
Too late in the night to phone her
so he laid in his bed to slumber

That night he dreamed a nightmare
That he made a mysterious call
The power went out in a sudden flare
By the way my real name is Paul

There soon came a knock at the door
A man like nothing ive seen in all my days
Evil and cold to the core
Who set the mysterious number ablaze

Before his retreat, a new number to dial!
I sat down and gave it a buzz
Hung up after letting it ring awhile
The power returned and i woke in a fuzz

I scurried over to the table
To find the clock at 12:00 and the number missing
This brings an end to my fable
Im sure the fear has you pissing

[Lefiel]

PAUL ? OH MY GOD ITS PAUL WALL THE PEOPLES CHAMP!!! HIS NAME LIGHTS UP LIKE A LAMP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! oh my c.c i must confess herr boner. i knew of your name from a spy i had contact with whom was DEEP within your camp forgive me

[Golds]

Ok... so maybe he's not queer as in likes guys... but he sure is queer as in he has some strange ass dreams.

[thelegendarycravy]

What if all the world's inside of your head
Just creations of your own?
Your devils and your gods
All the living and the dead
And you're really all alone?

[Bartuc]

I'm too spent atm to craft any filigrees, but I just had to find out - is that a dream "for realz"? Because I fucking hate nightmares and that would have totally tripped me out.

Oh and there's some movie on Spike right now about an evil Santa chasing a couple of kids or something. What the fuck? Omg Santa's not supposed to be bad!! roffle roffle! He's supposed be good lmao how ironic!

[Golds]

Dude that's Santa's Slay... with WWE's Goldberg as Santa! At least there some hot chicks in it!

[Boner]

Yes the dream is real, i suffer from sleep deprivation due to horrific nightmares that ill be sure to share more on in the future. Several times my dreams have extended to waking hallucinations, where ill wake up and still be dreaming. It sucked when i was a kid but after so long its just made me extremely ballsy when it comes to 'scarey' things most people piss their pants over

[Bartuc]

I can empathize with the chronic nightmare thing because I used to roll like that. But waking hallicination? I must say, hoooooo mama. Props for that shit. I always imagined it'd be the worst thing in the world if things ever crossed that line and starting seeping into reality; When I woke up the first thing I'd try and do is chill out before I started spinning up visions of some insane crap I knew wasn't really going to be there. Not that knowing would probably help much. I mean, cognizant of their falsehood or not, can you really ever get used to seeing a tentacle-brain sitting on your couch, and then not seeing it there a second later? When you open up the fridge and see a whorling vortex through which is visible a vast, burning field of screaming corpses, could you just roll your eyes and go "been there, done that, Brain" and casually reach in for the Dew you know lies behind the Infernal Plane?

[Boner]

When you open up the fridge and see a whorling vortex through which is visible a vast, burning field of screaming corpses, could you just roll your eyes and go "been there, done that, Brain" and casually reach in for the Dew you know lies behind the Infernal Plane?

Hoo that made me laugh teehee. Yea sadly at this point i just give the vortex a quick glance, say hi to Steve and Bob (two screaming corpses ive become quite friendly with) and do the dew. Actually most of my waking dreams end as i get out of bed, i can only remember two occasions where they didnt.

1) i was dreaming i was being chased by several dudes in crazy black S.W.A.T like gear and gas masks with rather large guns. I ran up to my house and down the hallway towards my room. I looked behind me to see one of the dudes remove his mask to reveal a rotting skull with blood pouring out of the eyes. and i run into my room. At this point i wake up to see my door shaking on the hinges and a loud banging outside. I got up out of bed and opened the door to see the bleeding skull floating there. Close my eyes for 10 seconds and open them to see its gone.

2) I had another dream where i was walking down my hallway and heard creeking in the attic. So like the upstanding white person i am i naturally went up to investigate. As i peer through the attic door i see on the opposite end and old woman in a rocking chair with her back to me. I approach her, reaching about halfway there when the rocking chair spins around. The old lady is decaying into a half alive half dead mess. She then opens her eyes to reveal nothing but blackness, and arises from the chair floating into the air. While in the air with her hands spread out, her finger nails begin to grow uncontrollably and her hair fans out and grows the same as she cackles maniacally. At this point i woke up and heard the creeking, tell myself its just a waking dream but it doesnt go away. I get up and go out into the hallway. While walking down it all of the sudden long fingernail crash through the ceiling in front of me and i fall back to the floor. As i scramble up they are gone.

So yea, after maybe 15 or so years of that (think it started when i was 5 or 6) you get pretty used to it. Just gonna suck when some poltergeist is really chillin in my humble abode, cuz ill just be walkin by it saying 'sup dream'

[Lefiel]

i used to have really bad deja vu. one might ask how can deja vu be bad ? well i would have these dreams and months later what i dreamed would happend. i cant really remember any of the dreams but when they would really happen i would get these wierd out of body experience like "this cannot be happening" those few times in my life i felt like i was hm. best way i can describe it is a strange kind of high(altho ive nvr gotten high >_> *cough* <_<). ill add more later gotta go to class. well i want to start off first by saying math: fuck you very much. anyways yea the dreams beo has are pretty heavy. almost like hallucinations except they start when hes asleep and just carry on till he awakes. beos not the kinda cat to get blazed or wasted or nuffin' so cant blame it on a rly wild night or sumthin. started when he was young too. only thing that could explain it in a philosophical sense(which i love to use just to screw with ppl) is a deus deceptor is basically getting off on on beo's extremely vivid dreams. his dreams prove the interchangeability of our waking and dreaming states. how do we know that what we call a "world" isnt just one big ass dream ? i mean if this deus deceptor(basically that means an "evil genius" whos in the heavens plugging thoughts n shit into our minds for the sheer pleasure of seeing what the fuck will happen) does exist, althought we can nvr be sure to either extent, then every single thought we have is subject to speculation as to whether(finally spelled that gd word correctly) is truly is "ours". fairly discouraging idea isnt it? if your having trouble processing this try this example; if you've ever seen the matrix (all of them prefferably) thats basically a giant film adaptation of of everything Rene Descartes(pronounced "day-cart") spent his life working on in the philosophical world. that basically you cant be sure anything that happens is real or not. so it could be beo's dreams are indeed real. it could be that our deja vu is actually an ability we have to see into the future. it could equally be we're blowing all of this out of proportion and wasting server space on nonsense. now when i used the term "deus deceptor" i was in no way referring to god or anything. cuz the definition of god basically prevents him or her from being a deus deceptor. the simple version of this is: we dont know what the fuck is real or not.

[Golds]

i used to have really bad deja vu. one might ask how can deja vu be bad ? well i would have these dreams and months later what i dreamed would happend. i cant really remember any of the dreams but when they would really happen i would get these wierd out of body experience like "this cannot be happening" those few times in my life i felt like i was hm. best way i can describe it is a strange kind of high(altho ive nvr gotten high >_> *cough* <_<). ill add more later gotta go to class.

I can honestly say I've had that same thing happen to me multiple times as well... I honestly think there is something to that dreams predicting the future stuff... although I feel sorry for Boner if what's happened to us starts happening to him.

[Boner]

Oh predictor dreams are nothing new to me. Many times what i have dreamed has come true, the only nightmarish one coming true being the death of my grandfather. But on a funny note i once dreamed when i was in 5th grade that my teacher gave us a pop quiz that i didnt get anything right on, then she went over the test with me after class. Well next day i went to school and what do ya know a pop quiz. In reality though i knew all the answers from my dream so i didnt fail it. Trippy huh?

But yea ive talked to many people about dreams coming true and im not the only one who has experienced it, as is evident from Golds and Lef. Many people who havent experienced this look at me like im crazy, but from my own experience and hearing the same from other people of seemingly sound mind (not that i myself am of sound mind), i truly believe in this. If you think about it we often have dreams we cant remember parts of or any of it at all. I believe when people have deja vu (or h/e its spelled) its just an unremembered dream coming into reality.

So yes i have horrific nightmares which often cross over into the plain of the waking AND i have dreams that often predict what will happen in real life. And they wonder why i only sleep 4-6 hours a night?

[Tyler]

i rarely have deja vu, but when i do it feels exactly as lef described it lol.



you can always tell when you have those dreams that are gunna come true, for me anyway, cuz it feels like im having deja vu in the dream as well, and you forget the said dream almost as soon as you wake up and its always the ones you strain to try and remember

[Lefiel]

i seem to forget dreams where theres a rly pretty girl and graphic sex involved the moment i wake up and that rly sux ive slightly spent my philosophical reserves and with the teacher of of town till monday im basically going slowly stupid as time goes by so ima need to go take another crack at Kant later tonight to refill my brain.

i completely agree with the forgetting deja vu dreams as soon as you wake up tyler. but when the act itself rly happens your like, "what the hell, i swear i dreamed this happend this is trippy". beo: ive rarely slept a full night (from 1-8 am or w/e). i wake in the middle of the night often. when i was younger i could go to bed at 10 or so and sleep till 1 or 2, now a days i rarely sleep past 11 even on weekends.

[Bartuc]

Sleeping to 11 is still sleeping for 13 hrs hahah jfc

dag yo; dag

[Lefiel]

i shoulda reprashed it; during the week(cept fri/sat) i usually go to bed at 12-12:30 no later than 1. usually wake up at 3 or 4 am. wake up at 8 and get rdy for class n whatnot.fri and sat ok yea im not going to bed till sum ungodly faggorty hour. example: go to bed at 5 am wake up at 11 am. dubyu-tee-eff.

[Bartuc]

If I go to sleep at 5am I'll wake up at 5pm. None of this namby-pamby, "zomg my body can't stand the sun" crap. Which is why I try not to go to sleep at 5am